10. "Wham Rap! (Enjoy What You Do)" Wham! (1982)
I suppose you could take any Wham! song and put it on this list. They're kind of an easy and obvious choice, given George Michael's history of lewd acts in public bathrooms. But I think it would feel somehow incomplete without Wham! on it. Also, I couldn't come up with a #10 pick because all The Village People's music videos are blocked from embedding on YouTube. Plus, I'm not that clever. Anyway, here's Wham! getting their hip-hop groove on in leather jackets, jeans, and t-shirts; the perfect ensemble for any gangsta' thug.
9. "I Want to Break Free" Queen (1984)
Before tragically succumbing to complications from AIDS in 1991, Queen's lead singer Freddie Mercury was one of the most acclaimed front-men in rock n' roll history. His four-octave vocal range and flamboyant stage persona lead Queen to 18 number one albums, 18 number one singles, and (from some estimates) selling 300 million albums worldwide. At around the 3:00 mark, you can watch him slide face first over a bunch of crotches and butts.
8. "I'm Too Sexy" Right Said Fred (1992)
In the summer of 1992, Americans were swept off their feet by the British trio Right Said Fred's "I'm Too Sexy", a song satirizing narcissism in the fashion world. Much like other infamous ear worms like "The Macerena" and "La Vida Loca" the public and media loved the catchy hook...then realized the song was awful and swore never to mention it again.
7. "Wild Boys" Duran Duran (1984)
I had never heard of this song, much less seen the video before I started putting this list together. Now I've watched it three times. It's got expensive production values and a lot of weird costumes/choreography/early CGI going on and the lyrics are about...uh...wild boys, I guess, but other than that...I'm drawing a blank. I think the video must be one of those Men In Black memory-wipe things that fries your brain because I really can't think of anything after watching it. I'm afraid if i see it one more time I might...er...what was I talking about?
6. "You Think You're A Man" Divine (1984)
Like many people, I was first exposed to Divine through John Waters' notorious 1972 cult-classic Pink Flamingos, in which the actor eats real dog shit on camera. Not the most conventional way to introduce yourself to the public, but hey, it worked! Divine ended up starring in ten of Waters' films and even became a notable character actor before his/her sad death in 1988. Apparently, he/she also released some albums with a few songs even breaking the top 40 charts in countries like New Zealand and Germany, including this one off The Story So Far. Not really a great song, but be warned: it's a catchy mofo that will be stuck your head for at least 24 hours and it's really not something you should be singing out loud around the office.
5. "The Crying Game" Boy George (1992)
In case you've never seen it, the 1992 film The Crying Game is your basic boy-meets-girl story. Only halfway through the girl takes off her dress and has a penis. When writer/director Neil Jordon was looking for someone to record a cover of the 1964 Dave Berry tune (for which the film takes it's name) he asked 80's icon Boy George, possibly to crank the gay themed film to 11.
4. "Hot Rockin" Judas Priest (1981)
In 1998 Judas Priest's lead singer Rob Halford came out and became the first openly gay heavy-metal singer. The most shocking thing about the reveal was that it came 17 years after this video, which pretty much leaves no question about the group's homosexual overtones. The first part of the video features Halford and the rest of the band hitting the gym; lifting weights shirtless, singing in the shower, and relaxing in the sauna. Nothing really "gay" per se about any of those things, but...uhhh...
3. "Rock Me Tonight" Billy Squier (1984)
Have you noticed that a lot of these are from the year 1984? What was with that year? Anyhoo, so this is the video that killed Billy Squier's career. In it, Squier puts on a pink tank top and prances around. That's it. I guess a lot of people thought Squier was gay, or on drugs after seeing it. I don't understand what all the hoopla was about. I mean, daaaaaaaamn...that kid can dance!
2. "Dancing In the Streets" David Bowie and Mick Jagger (1985)
This probably wouldn've been #1 if Family Guy hadn't already pointed out how unsettling it is by playing the video almost in it's entirety, after which Brian, the dog, says "We ALL let that happen." Bowie's ex-wife claims that around the time of filming she caught Bowie and Jagger in bed together...naked. Years later during a press conference one reporter questioned Jagger about the incident asking "Did you sleep with David Bowie?" to which he responded "Of course!". Case closed**
1. "Life at the Outpost" Skatt Brothers (1979)
There is nothing homosexual about this video at all. I don't know why it's on this list.
**No case actually exists.
